Concept of Time and Conditioning Withering Away at My Desires
April is a month that is bitter sweet to me. It is the month I graced this Earth but it is also a month that shows me that I am another year older, wiser, and more self-aware. I write myself a letter every year on my birthday telling my future self what I see happening in the next year. Most of it comes true, sometimes I am not as far along as I thought I would be but that is where the self-awareness comes in.
Self-awareness can be difficult or great depending on the situation and how you look at it. I am very much aware that I have the ability to trudge on with my gifts when I put them in my to do list. If I don’t they get forgotten and put to the wayside for another day or another year when I remember them and put them back in my life again. Some of my awareness has shown me how conditioned I am to time and how I keep feeling like trading dollars for time. I know that there is a better way for me to make money. That I don’t have to trade time for a certain amount of dollars. However I keep coming back to that paradigm. I keep getting up every day going to work in a position in which I trade my time for a certain amount of money. Years ago it never occurred to me that there was any other way to make money. However, with the dawning of the internet age more and more people have proven that yes you can have work/life balance. Yes, you can make more money than you ever thought possible even working less than a job in which you trade time for dollars.
I love putting my fingers on the keys and typing letters that form thoughts and ideas that can inspire others. I know my gift, I understand my gifts purpose. Do you think I put my gift first in my life? No, I don’t.. Currently it gets a monthly voice to come out of nowhere and perform. I have made a commitment to allow my gift to display its purpose once a month. That is my small step to change. I actually thought about giving it up this month but told myself, “No, it is only once a month. You can do this!” So here I am following through not knowing exactly what is going to come out but that whatever it is will inspire someone, most likely, me. That is all that matters.
I love watching this lady on Instagram talking about her garden and how she loves to be in it and teach others how to garden. She decided to follow her passion and it has paid off in more abundance than she imagined. It has poured out of her soul and as it does she attracts more and more followers. Her genuine love of her garden has naturally summoned the attention of so many.
And that is all we have to do. Show up and show our passion for our gifts. That’s it. And the more you show up the more you will attract. Just like my conditioning of trading dollars for hours. I show up every day to a job and give my time and the job pays me a agreed upon amount. Day after day. I do the same thing. I could get frustrated but I have a plan. Yes I could just leap bounds ahead and just do my passion 24 hours a day but if I did that and was still conditioned the way I am right now nothing would change because my belief would not be with my passion. My belief would be back with exchanging time for a certain amount of money. Until my belief changes the only thing I can do is work in the steps little by little giving an hour a month or more and just being consistent with it. In time it will be a natural part of my life and will increase to a weekly practice. Until then I am happy to show up here monthly and continue to share my gift. I trust that it will sprout more ideas and encourage me to write more often soon!
Blissings to you,
Jessica
P.S. I invite you to take a moment and write down what you would love to do in your life. And then find an hour a month to dedicate that idea to your life. Even if it is just something you are interested in and not sure you want to do . Research it then do it and see how it feels. If you don’t feel a spark of joy try something else just keep focusing on what you can do to bring yourself joy and the money will follow…eventually :)
